My friend Stanley asks me how my year went. It’s the first time I’ve seen him in three months, and we’re filling each other in on everything that’s been going on since the last time we met. I cannot for the life of me put into words the way I feel. Somehow the idea of the year ending feels too abrupt and I am transported back to my primary five classroom, writing the answer to a question on my exam sheet as fast as possible before the teacher yells “Time’s up!”
2023 has been that kind of year.
I started the year in high spirits. My friends and I found a new apartment. It was large. Way larger than the previous place we’d lived in. I observed spiritual practice consistently, and read books that helped me grow. I got reviewed and got a raise at my two jobs. Things were going smoothly till I was flung into the washing machine reality of things. It was one activity after the other and over and over and over again until I blinked and it was the 28th of December and I was sitting in front of my laptop, thinking, “What happened this year, Treasure?”
I’m glad I chose to journal weekly, as it’s the only way I have been able to remember that by most accounts, 2023 was a good year. A year of many firsts. 2023 stretched me, and there was some beauty in that. But deep down, I was tired and I am very relieved that the year is coming to an end.
As I have done in previous years, this review will be split into the different areas of my life, and at the end, I will share my favourite lessons from the year. Let’s begin!
Health
I fell sick a lot this year. Mentally, I wasn’t in a very good place either.
I remember a conversation I had with Oluchukwu at a games night, where I told him that I couldn’t remember the last time I felt something. He told me that as writers we sometimes believe that we must exist in emotional extremes before we can create art, and while I understood what he meant, I wish I had explained the way I felt better. It wasn’t just the sadness I had lost. It was also the joy. I would be in spaces that were meant to foster wild, unbridled joy in me, and feel nothing. In 2023, I felt nothing and everything. It was a truly exhausting year, emotionally.
I am still trying to figure it out. I tried therapy. It helped. Taking walks helped. Noting the moments where it occurs to me that I am in good spirits, just so I can sit with them and revel in their warmth and presence helped. When I was writing the article about Spotify, I was happy. When I went out with Toyosi and spent a shit ton of money moving from restaurant to restaurant, I was ecstatic. When I listened to Javelin by Sufjan Stevens for the first time while walking home from school, I felt it in my bones. These are small steps, and we’re getting somewhere.
Relationships
I would like to begin by thanking everyone that showed up for me this year. All the friendships that were doors and mirrors and windows and safe spaces. Friendships that showed me things I didn’t know about myself; that saw me beyond what everyone else could see. Friendships that allowed me to escape and experience some semblance of peace. I didn’t fall or fail because I had people with me, and I was confident that they would help me. I experienced a million and one little and big kindnesses throughout 2023. I felt very very loved.
But this love was not painless. Prior to this year, I had never experienced friendship breakups. It was foreign for me to love a friend and let them go. I guess I learned that sometimes life throws curveballs at you. Sometimes people leave because they want to leave. Sometimes you don’t want the same things, and that’s okay. Sometimes you have to leave to protect your sanity. There are many reasons why you should let a love go.
My biggest lesson this year was learning to embrace individuality and love myself more. A conversation with Mary-Esther over pad thai floats back to memory. I looked at her like she had all the answers. “How do you love people without it hurting?”
“You need to learn to be alone.”
Love
I am proud to announce that this was another year being single. (This is where you clap!). To make matters more interesting, there were also no situationships this year, unlike previous ones where I had dabbled in a few. I was by myself, throughout, a wildflower in the wind.
There was bliss in this state of being, though it was also a tad boring. I wouldn’t bore you with my expectations for next year, but know that there will be signsssss. Plenty of them. Watch and see.
Work
2023 was the most fulfilling year of my life, workwise. I am giddy even writing about it. I experienced tremendous career growth and I am so proud of all the ways in which I applied myself. I did things that really scared me, like starting Marketers Therapy, branding HOW I, and putting out my portfolio. It was beautiful to do and experience.
This year, I worked on so many exciting projects that were very impactful and I honestly loved every bit of it. In February I handled my first project at Selar, the Student Webinar. Then in July, the Selar Creator Summit, which had about 20,000 people from all over the world register. At Founders Connect, I was part of the team organizing the two live events we held this year, one in Lagos and one in London. I also helped bring HOW I: The Series to life. Then, from a series of conversations had with my friend Michael, Marketers Therapy, a space where marketers could come and vent and share and feel whole again was created. Of course, there was also the work I did for LMUN 2022/23 and now 2024, a youth organization I love so much. All these spaces nurtured the leader in me, and I am genuinely grateful for them.
I experienced certain career changes too. In September I moved from the social media department to the content department at Selar. This was a huge move for me because even though I had always known how to write content, I wasn’t familiar with SEO, email marketing, etc. so I started the process of learning something new, and my! It has been so rewarding.
With content creation, this was the year I started actively working with brands and getting opportunities that blew my mind. It’s crazy to me because I treated content creation more or less like a hobby, so I wonder what would happen if I took it seriously. I guess we will find out in 2024.
At the end of the year, I had to leave one of my jobs because I realized I was burned out, and I couldn’t keep going at the tempo I had been going at throughout the year. This was not my first time leaving a job, but it was the first time it deeply hurt because I loved the work I did there, and I was in love with the people I worked with. So I am entering 2024 with only one job, and I am curious to see how this new phase of my life will pan out.
School
Writing this review, I thought I was done and had to rack my brain for what was missing before I realised that I hadn’t written about school. I feel like this should tell you something about how completely, and genuinely over school I am. I don’t like anything about it, I don’t like studying law, and yet, here I am. There is some good news. I am in my final year so I have six more months before I can leave this space and focus on things I actually love, like marketing and content. But I will revel in this phase because I know a thing or two about missing things I leave behind.
I plan to spend the remaining six months of my studentship building closer connections with my coursemates and making the proverbial memories that I am told I’d miss when I leave University. In all this, I am truly thankful I found marketing when I did. That’s all I can say.
Self
I would say that this year I got to know myself better and experience life on a richer, fuller dimension. I remember feeling happy that I was able to afford to do many things that gave me joy. I explored fashion more, wore more beautiful jewelry, read books that I really really enjoyed, and expanded my musical palate. I really loved Hamilton: The Musical, and was obsessed with it for like three months! I deeply allowed myself to enjoy media. God bless the media!
On a deeper level, I learned the following things about life, in no particular order:
- Master Yourself; be your own bestfriend: You will live with yourself for the rest of your life, so you might as well understand who you are, what you like and dislike, your wants, needs, desires, as best as you can. You cannot learn yourself if you don’t spend enough time alone. So spend time alone. Not with music, or books. Just by yourself.
- From Time to Time, Cook Your Own Meals: This year I discovered the magic of cooking for myself. Apart from the fact that it saved me a lot of money that I would have given to Chowdeck, it also was a form of self-care. I liked the intentionality behind chopping vegetables, picking beans, and deboning fish, just to ensure that my body could get the required enjoyment and nourishment it deserved. The act of cooking was transformed into an act of love.
- Do Good Work: If there’s anything Peace Itimi has taught me in this life, it is this one thing. Doing good work consistently will do wonders for your career. There are no cheat codes. Put your head down and work.
- Stop Talking: Honestly, sometimes we say too much and do too little. Not everybody needs to know your plans, desires or fears. Not everybody has your best interests at heart. Invest in a journal and share your ideas and secrets there instead. Unless you’re ready to execute, it’s better to just be quiet.
- Visibility is Currency: Putting myself out there in 2023 gave me a lot of opportunities that I wouldn’t have gotten otherwise. You don’t realise it, but people are always watching and the easiest way to stay on top of mind is by showing up consistently. It’s not enough to do number 3, You have to talk about your work too. In public, out in the open, everywhere. Your talking about it is what would make others realize how special the work you do is. So invest in your storytelling abilities. Do cool shit and talk about it.
- Discipline is the highest form of Self-love It’s very simple. Whenever we place people in high regard, and we make promises to them, we do everything in our power to follow through. So how then do you know if you rate yourself? Well, there you have it.
For 2024, apart from career growth and progress, I desire more peace, more healing, and more grounding of the self. I want to experience things more deeply. To live life on a fuller dimension. I want to do more. To be more, for myself first, and then to the people I love. 2024 is shaping up to be a very self-focused year, and I like that. I can’t wait to experience new things. There are so many beautiful things to see, touch, and taste, and I will have them all.
